[HighLow21]

wyman, on 2012-February-29, 18:48, said:

You post like this:

And then you get all indignant about ad hominem attacks (need I point out that you disagreed with Wank by saying "wank is probably an appropriate name"?) and about how it's not fair these people picking on you and not reading your arguments.

And then you post a sob thread (in general bridge discussion -- wtf?) to garner sympathy? Pretty sick dude.

I'm sorry to hear about your girlfriend; no one should have to go through that. But that doesn't change the fact that you are an absolutely terrible poster. I love how Justin's comments can be "dangerous as fire," but you are free to authoritatively claim that your decision is the only acceptable one.

It's just unreal how self-righteous you are. But you're right, I'm the obnoxious, offensive, and unacceptable one.

Points taken.

[jjbrr]

bbf drama is the best drama

Spoiler

seriously, though, I'm sorry to hear about your girlfriend. I, too, hope for a full recovery. When we step back and look at these silly flamewars in the context of things like that, obviously it's nothing to be frivolous about, and I shouldn't make light of things.

[HighLow21]

jjbrr, on 2012-February-29, 19:25, said:

bbf drama is the best drama

Indubitably!

[rduran1216]

people on the internet are very brave. People who play bridge are some combination of fat nerds, skinny nerds, rich nerds, and ugly nerds (there is overlap.)

You can't take any attacks on here seriously. Most people take on persona's when they post on the internet, the people on here who troll people, the cliques that have developed on here, its all an internet attack. You just have to realize that people playing a middle school style popularity contest on the internet are all assholes. Trading playful barbs is just part of the internet experience, and you will develop thick skin in time. It helps to meet people away from this place. Hell when I started here Phil and I went at it in every thread (or at least thats how I remember it lol) And now we have met multiple times and even played on teams together.

Point is, it will change, don't take it too personal, and I hope things improve for you.

[akhare]

Tate,

Sorry to hear about your girlfriend and if it's any consolation, a very close family member made it back from the very brink after a bout with the big C.

FWIW, IMO, the cloak of anonymity does cause some people to shed the sense of decorum that they might otherwise have had in a face to face conversation. Moreover, the nature of the medium does lend itself to the instant expression of thoughts that look undoubtedly silly or regrettable in retrospect.

As others have noted, it's best to develop a thick skin regarding such things...

[ggwhiz]

I've been toasted roasted and left a couple of threads bleeding from the eyeballs.

I too am sorry for your bad news but TOUGHEN UP! You are needed. Mind you, if venting here gives you strength I'm all for it.

[Statto]

akhare, on 2012-February-29, 21:10, said:

the nature of the medium does lend itself to the instant expression of thoughts that look undoubtedly silly or regrettable in retrospect.

F2F conversation does that too, just it's not recorded, unless NewsCorp are following you...

[MrAce]

Tate needs a group hug

[MrAce]

dicklont, on 2012-February-29, 17:20, said:

http://xkcd.com/386/

Dude...how true this is

I have to admit i did that, and not only i didnt get any after i am done replying to the "wrong" person on the net, i had to deal with a ***** face the next 2-3 days

[HighLow21]

MrAce, on 2012-February-29, 23:36, said:

Tate needs a group hug

Hahahaha!

This just made my day. :-)

[MrAce]

Bro you are just unlucky that you have not been taken under the protective upvote wings of Lurpoa or Lurpoas. Once she or "they" get to like you, you can triple the upvote numbers of veteran posters here in no time !

[Free]

I've had my share of flame wars in the past. Usually a friendly PM trying to resolve the issue with "the enemy" does wonders, because in many cases he/she didn't even realize your feelings got hurt in some way. And usually I react quite aggressively when something personal is bothering me, so I'm equally at fault...

Many of us appear to be hard to someone else on the forum, but actually we're all fluffy bunnies.

Very sorry to hear about your girlfriend.

EDIT: I just read a few threads and must say that you are the one attacking people. You shouldn't be surprised that you get that many "ad hominem" attacks... Stop quoting people for a month and see if the climate changes. Also don't claim things without arguments.

[Fluffy]

Free, on 2012-March-01, 00:20, said:

but actually we're all fluffy bunnies.

Do not include me!

[dwar0123]

As a new poster myself who has also gotten into arguments with some of the established posters I can sympathize a little. I've been derided by phil and mocked a couple of times by jlogic and others, mostly while having a fairly long argument with rogerclee who ironically was very polite through the whole thing.

Anyway, people will always raise to the defense of known posters, that is normal. It is human nature to rally behind the people you respect when they are threatened by an unknown outsider. You are not going to change this and in 7 years when you are the known poster I'd question whether or not you still think it should change. They earned that respect through countless conversations proving the merit and thoughtfulness of their posts. Appeal to authority is not always a logical fallacy and when the context is complex and highly subjective, it rarely ever is. Experience and merit count for an awful lot in this context for very valid reasons.

I've recently read several of the threads that were the genesis for this thread and I have to say that phil is right when he picked this quote out as one of your key issues.

HighLow21, on 2012-February-29, 12:19, said:

I may not be the best bridge player in the world, but I know when I'm right.

Even the best bridge player in the world would question if they are right when their peers universally disagree with them. And the implication here is not that I think you are peers with those that have disagreed with you, far from it, but even if you were the best bridge player in the world, your statement is still flawed.

This leads me to the 2nd issue I see. You paint far to much in black and white. You may not agree with the 1♠ overcall, you may not like it but even you upvoted jlogic when he gave the full explanation of why he would do it. Sure he could go down 1100, but the extreme rarity of that is dwarfed by the chances of a double game swing in his favor. Regardless of whether or not that changes how you would bid in that situation calling the overcall ludicrous is a very black and white statement when the issue is far more subjective and nuanced.

Which brings me to the final issue I see. Respect. You keep referring to the many ad hominem attacks made against you. In actuality they are not ad hominem attacks. An ad hominem attack is saying you are wrong because you are a clown, not saying you are a clown because you are wrong. There is a subtle but important difference, one is a logical fallacy the other is just being disrespectful(it might help you see the difference if you consider that you were in fact a professional clown).

And they have been disrespectful, no doubt, but they are just returning the disrespect that they see you giving by calling people's bids ludicrous and actually someone else made quite a lengthy list of examples which I am sure you can recall.

The point being, while you may not be calling people names, you are being no less disrespectful and honestly quite a lot more disrespectful and generally initiating the disrespect.

Anyway, I am sorry about your girlfriend, I hope she gets better and I hope you don't take this to harshly I suffer a lot of the same issues which my decades of trolling forums has helped me learn to spot and vanquish in my own posts.

[gwnn]

Sorry about girlfriend. Not much I can say about that.

One thing about bidding threads: there's a lot of superstition and incidental evidence involved in a lot of posts (mine too!). People will say stuff like "I've been this convention for 20 years and it never caused a problem for me [hence it is a good convention]". Note that you will never have this in play threads. No one will say "I always take the finesse when I have 9 cards missing the queen and it works more often than not", because it is demonstrably false. Now of course not every hand can be deduced mathematically, but some can (notably suit combinations). And it's also fine to say "usually a 3-3 split is 36% but now that opponents have been relatively quiet, it is more than that." - this is not strictly quantifiable any more, but it is still much more objective than some example hand or another when a particular call works wonders.

[gwnn]

dicklont, on 2012-February-29, 17:20, said:

http://xkcd.com/386/

[daveharty]

gwnn, on 2012-March-01, 02:33, said:

No one will say "I always take the finesse when I have 9 cards missing the queen and it works more often than not", because it is demonstrably false.

[Codo]

Hi Tate,

I understand your sentiments. Sometimes the internet community is very rude. This is sometimes even true in a highly social community like the bbf.
-It is not just the anonomity. Sometimes people tried to be funny and hurt others without intentions.
-If I call someone a clown while looking in his face, he will be in a much better position to understand my intentions then when I just write it. (BTW Czaba is a clown)
-Sometimes personal attacks are a matter of misunderstandings. Maybe the youth has words which are insulting to the senior citizens. Maybe non native English speakers write something what is not insulting in their language but in yours.
- Sometimes you are annoyed and answer to a "silly" statement very emotional. And even worse: You are the only one who think that the statement is silly.

But this is just one part of the truth. The other part is: You came here and claimed to be an expert. You insulted others. Your wording about your opinion is quite strong. You make your opinions look like the eternal truth. This is bad, even if ou are right. But if you hold a minority view, you better be careful with your wording.

But good news are comming: Despite the fact that you more or less annoyed "anybody", many posters tried to be helpful to you in this threat. And everybody gives you pardon for your insults. Hopefully you grant us your pardon for our insults, too.

But whatever we do here. This is not real life, it does not really matter. So hopefully that part of your life will improve dramatically. All the best wishes to you and your girlfriend.

[gordontd]

Codo, on 2012-March-01, 08:43, said:

But this is just one part of the truth. The other part is: You came here and claimed to be an expert. You insulted others. Your wording about your opinion is quite strong. You make your opinions look like the eternal truth. This is bad, even if ou are right. But if you hold a minority view, you better be careful with your wording.

But good news are comming: Despite the fact that you more or less annoyed "anybody", many posters tried to be helpful to you in this threat.

+1

[Phil]

I think you're all a bunch of WIMPs. Cat pictures? Cartoon characters HUGGING?

Christ. You all suck.